On Monday night I went to a screening of, “Secret Sunshine,” Korean director Chang-dong Lee’s newest film. After my friends, co-workers and acquaintances rejected my invitation to go see the film, my colleague (Ernest!) finally relented and came as my plus one. We saw the film at Rose Theater in the Time Warner Center as part of the New York Film Festival. The screening included a brief question and answer session with Chang-dong Lee, which was a great closing to a disturbingly bleak film. I found the film to be brilliant, confusing, sad and enlightening. I will not go into the plot of this film, as I found it fantastic to know virtually nothing about the film. The most poignant scene for me in the film is when the protagonist, Shin-ae, goes to visit her son’s murderer in prison. Shin-ae has recently found God and has gone to prison to offer her forgiveness, but when she arrives the murderer tells her he too has found God; who has offered him forgiveness and atonement for his sins. Horrified by the idea her son’s killer has been forgiven by someone other than her, Shin-ae faints in the parking lot of the jail. Something about this scene touched me and made me realize it is acceptable to feel. Throughout the film Shin-ae is learning to cope with one horrifying experience after another, showing the human will to survive. No, my life has not been horribly affected by anyone, so I cannot try to say this woman’s experience is anything like my own. Actually, it’s quite rude to relate my own salvation in this woman’s experience. I can’t help but find the film’s narcissistic relevance in my life and felt it allowed me the right to be angry, justifying my desire to not be the bigger person. In order to find happiness in my life, I need to find contentment and closure on my issues. The film helped give me closure on some of the recent events in my life. I suppose one can find meaning in most anything, if one looks hard enough. I am looking for closure and purpose.
After the film I parted ways with Ernest and stopped at Bouchon Bakery To-Go for a CB&J. Thomas Keller, one of my numerous chef crushes, expanded his restaurant empire to include this fantastically chic carry-out counter. I am a fan of the CB&J, a Toasted Brioche Cashew Butter and Apricot Jam Sandwich. Since it was just a little before 9 PM, the pastry display cases were virtually empty save for a few pastries, the sandwiches, soup and chocolate tarts. I ordered a bran muffin and a CB&J. The muffin was packed into a little bag, which I saved for breakfast the following morning. I waited a few minutes for the kitchen to toast my sandwich. They coat the thick slices of brioche in butter before toasting the sandwich, giving a grilled cheese like crisp buttery crust. Unfortunately, the sandwich was not warm all the way through, leaving the sandwich lacking its usual gooey cashew butter middle. Despite the temperature issues, the sandwich was a welcome warm treat. Overall, it was a soul satisfying Monday night adventure.
